You know today I realised I have amazing friends and people in my life. They just make it so much easier for me on most days. When its hard and beaten down and when I can barely remember how to smile, they are always there to make me laugh. Like today, I was on my way to getting all emo but this friend *umm lets say AR* made this krazy group convo where me, AR and this guy *umm RHF :P* and we were trying to persuade him to take us shopping... n i swear I think I got high or something and he was like "My dad will kill me" and i went -- "Not if we kill him first" LMAO! and the list of other stuff which are making me smile right now as I'm thinking of them. Lol srsly, my face is like glowing or something and I cant stop smiling :) I swea rhf guy is prolly wishing i were a guy so that he could beat the crap outta me and ar, cause honestly man we are driving him krazy.. lol. I have these great friends and these spontaneous, makes-me-smile-when-i-think-of-them memories. I've bin in a better place lately *I dont even remember why the fuck did I want to ever die?* You know after some time the pain decreases and u barely feel the stabbing anymore :) I've an amazing guy that I'm in love with and who loves me back, a perfect baby brother who loves me krazily and great friends. I guess its worth to hang in the pain cause one day you'll wake up and it doesnt hurt that much anymore. One day it gets bearable and then it stops mattering, you move on. One day you just get sick and tired of being sad and tired of feeeling the pain and then you feel something new, and in that moment you realise you're actually happy. But it feels so wrong only cause it's so new. Damn, I love this feeling :D
My friend tagged me in this note on fb and I love it, definitely inspires me :)
Dear pain,
Thank you for making me the beautiful person that I am. Thank you for teaching me everything I know. Thank you for showing me that God is just a prayer away. Thank you for turning my weaknesses into strengths, my precious moments into memories, my heart into a beating drum, my eyes into a well, and my body into a castle that holds a wealth of stories on every corner.
Right now, all I can do is kiss you goodbye, because what I'm sure of is that from his wounds, an oyster builds a pearl.
Sincerely,
Broken down, but getting up again!
I think i'm gonna go eat. I still sleep a lot. I slept 37 hours in 3 days. *I knw too damn much* I'm going to eat. and yeah u depressed people out there check out this douche bag on fb *youtube actually* -- Awais Ayoub add him up :P and check him out on youtube too http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=561rbfFQSkQ&feature=related
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